Hello again everyone. It's that time again. Finally back with another
new piece. I hope you all had a great 4th of July holiday. And I hope
this finds you all in great health and even better spirits. I've been
okay, myself. Under the circumstances. But I'm not going to get into
that, I'll just get straight into the poem. This piece is one that I've
been fighting with since my last entry. It seems like I started this one
in a flurry, but then my inspiration dried up quickly. Thankfully, I
was able to revisit it and finish it tonight. I was inspired by
listening to some amazing music from an artist known as
The Weeknd. If
you all aren't familiar with him, I assure you that you would want to do
just that. The man is amazing singer, and the music he sings over is
almost hypnotic in a way. And I just listened to a bunch of his music on
my ipod, while re-reading what I had saved for this poem. And suddenly,
the words started flowing again. And I didn't stop until it was
finished. And what results is a pretty dark poem. It's written from the
perspective from a man who is sitting in a bar room, and is drowning his
sorrows. And the distorted image he sees of himself, at the bottom of
the glass, matches how he feels about himself normally. So he recounts
his tale to whoever is listening around him. And hopefully, despite the
subject matter, you all will enjoy reading this. And thank you in
advance for taking the time to do so. It means more to me than you will
ever know...
"Dirty, Stained Glass"
2013
Set deep within the structure
Of a tale already told
Lies a point of view I'm sharing
That's not considered bold
See, I'm not picture perfect
A glimpse will turn your head
And maybe turn your stomach
Or so I've often said
But there's a bit of complication
Each time that we'd connect
Leaving you to say it isn't working
And I feel that you're correct
So if you feel me slipping
Then baby let me go
'Cause I will only hurt you
It's best for you to know
That I really don't deserve you
And maybe never will
Since there's something in my mind
That I can't seem to kill
And set deep along the edges
Of this current line I've towed
Lies the unknown that I've feared
That you have fought to show
To these tired eyes of mine
Who seek some better sights
Unaware it is myself
That's to blame for current plights
And there's a bit of contradiction
Inside these words of mine
Leaving you to have enough
While wanting out this time
So if you feel me slipping
Then baby let me go
'Cause I will only hurt you
It's best for you to know
That I really don't deserve you
And maybe never will
Since there's something in my mind
That I can't seem to kill
But then she said,
"I do feel you slipping
But I will not let go
'Cause that is what you want
An excuse to remain this low
And I can't change your mind
But I'm hoping that you'll find
The greater things in you,
That I already see
Since I've already fallen for
The man I believe you're gonna be
And set deep within my heart
Lies a love that's burning bright
While your world is upside down
And it's time we got it turning right
So baby, disregard those thoughts
Ringing loudly in your ears
'Cause you're a lovely man
Falling prey to childish fears
And I'm here to prove to you
What I have said before
And that's that everything I love
Is still worth fighting for
But it seems you've lost your will
And very urge to fight
As if you've grown tired of days
And only find comfort in the night
But that's not good enough for me
Neither is your apathy
So I feel I have to leave
Just to make you mad at me
Maybe then I'll make you feel
Something close to love
And forget this pity party
That you've failed to rise above
'Cause I've heard enough of that
To last for this life and the next
And I refuse to cut myself
On these pieces of regrets
So I'll let my heart pump
And refuse to let it bleed
Until you meet me halfway
And give me everything I need..."
And after hearing that
I wonder how I should respond
When my thoughts were making waves
Not unlike ripples in a pond
But I've been frozen in state
That some would label numb
And I don't know how to love
I only how to make a woman cum
But it's time I came correct
And offered up some truth
I've been too afraid to live
Think I've wasted all my youth
So how I'm supposed to find a path
When I'm still learning how to walk
After years of crawling on my knees
Proving to some that all I do is talk
Yeah, I can say the right thing
But fail to act at every wrong time
And so I haven't felt her tight thing
In a very long time
And I have not another soul to blame
Except the one that's staring back
From this dirty, stained glass
That's inspired bad luck with it's visible crack
And it's the kind of image seen
That could make a man drink
'Cause it seems nobody understands
These things I'm able to think
But now I wanna crawl out
From underneath this dark cloud
So I will drink and shut my mind off
After I say these statements aloud
Oh girl, if you feel me slipping
Then you need to let me go
'Cause I will only hurt you
It's for the best to let you know
That I really don't deserve you
And maybe never will
Since there's something in my mind
That I can't seem to kill
So somebody pour me another drink
And let me try to drown
The weight of these sorrows
That always hold this fool down...
