The Sharpest Knife

As often as my pen has saved my sanity, it has also put me in situations that have driven me crazy, lol. Well, to an extent anyway. See, this was a piece that ended up getting me into a bit of trouble with a woman I was talking to. It was written, at the time, about the way I felt when the first girlfriend I ever had recently moved back into my area. Her arrival brought back all sorts of thoughts and emotions with me. I was thinking maybe it was some kind of sign, that with her being a part of a better time in my life, that she would come back and help me regain whatever I had lost. But, of course, that didn't happen. Things like that don't happen to people like me. When she came back, it was with the man she is currently in love with. And with whom, she now shares a home. So needless to say, that stung. And upon my posting of this poem on another site, the woman I was talking to at the time, thought I still felt that way.Which I didn't. But the damage was done at the time. But anyway, enough rambling... Here is it...

"The Sharpest Knife"
2012

I've seen your every picture
And I've read your every tale
But it's when you mention him
That I feel myself turn pale
'Cause I can take your silence
I can take your false regard
But when I see him kiss your lips
Girl, I take it kinda hard
And I know you mean no harm
You're just livin' out your life
But to see you arm and arm
It cuts me like the sharpest knife
And I could go on and on
About how I can't go on
'Cause I have you every night
But when I wake you're gone
So please don't tell me, I
Shouldn't feel this way
'Cause there's still something in your eyes
That takes my breath away
And there's a space beneath my arm
Where you'd fit just right
It'll keep your nice and warm
If you wore it nice and tight
But the arms around you now
Don't belong to me
And I'm starting to wonder how
That could feel so wrong to me
'Cause I know you mean no harm
You're just livin' out your life
But to see you arm and arm
It cuts me like the sharpest knife
And I could go on and on
About how I can't go on
Since I have you every night
But when I wake you're gone
So please don't tell me, I
Shouldn't feel this way
'Cause there's still something in your eyes
That takes my breath away
Yes, I can tell you love him
But it still won't stop the hate
That I've reserved for me
For being the fool who chose to wait
To just express the things
That I would've liked to say
And it seems that I'm the reason why
You're still not here today
'Cause I'm a victim of me again
Rebuilding the walls of stone
That are known to keep me in
Good health and alone
See, I've perfected all the things
That keep the walls preserved
Knowing the misery it brings
Is all that I've deserved
'Cause I know you mean no harm
You're just livin' out your life
But to see you arm and arm
It cuts me like the sharpest knife
And I could go on and on
'Bout how I can't go on
'Cause I have you every night
But when I wake you're gone
So please don't tell me, I
Shouldn't feel this way
'Cause there's still something in your eyes
That takes my breath away
And there's a space beneath my arm
Where you'd fit just right
And it does my ego harm
To know it's empty stil tonight...